I recently came across an article on Medscape concerning childhood obesity and bullying.
The opening line states; “Obese children are more likely to be bullied than their nonobese peers regardless of sex, race, socioeconomic status (SES), social skills, or academic achievement, according to a University of Michigan study published online May 3 in Pediatrics.”
My initial reaction was; I wonder if I could get some fool to hand me a bunch of research money to study the possibility of the ground getting wet when it rains?
In my mind, obesity and bullying is just one of those topics that does not require any research. Ask any adult, me included, who was overweight as a child, if they experienced bullying.
I was picked on.
I was tormented.
I was mercilessly attacked, mostly verbally but sometimes physically, for being overweight.
I am not a psychologist nor a psychiatrist, but I understand what it is like to have been picked on as an overweight child. Hell, I wasn’t even that overweight.
I was always a “big-boned” youth. Growing up, I would get a hard time about it from my friends. Mostly it was harmless, but when I entered junior high school things changed.
It was in the seventh grade that good-natured ribbing changed over to malevolent, menacing, mean-spirited bullying. Kids from different grade schools came together in one place. I was no longer solely with the children I spent the last seven years getting to know. There were new kids I had never met, kids from the tougher parts of Greater Pittston. I was with twelve year olds that cursed, smoked and would think nothing of punching you in the face for looking at them funny.
To quote a movie, “I wasn’t in Kansas anymore.”
My torment started on the very first day, walking to school. In an alley were a gang of kids hanging out, smoking before we had to be in the building. It was from them I heard;
“Hey Fatso! Are you going to make it up the hill?!”
It was a mild taunt.
I just kept walking.
Each day it got worse.
I tried ignoring them, but that only fueled their need to hurl even more insults.
I tried walking faster, but I couldn’t escape their shouts.
I opted to walk a different way. That worked — until they found my new route.
After that, the insults became more vicious, punctuated by threatening profanities. Added to the comments about my weight, were affronts to my courage, or as they perceived, lack thereof.
I once tried to fight, but that was fruitless. I just got my ass kicked and gave the bullies more ammunition. These daily confrontations went on for all of seventh and eighth grade — for two long years, silently, I endured.
In ninth grade, things changed. I had been lifting weights with my best friend Francis for two years on and off, but that summer I became serious about it. I started to get more physically active. I even went out for football. The summer program of running and drills combined with weightlifting and better eating presented an unrecognizable person the following year.
I weighed more, but that weight was distributed differently. Though I still couldn’t fight my way out of a paper bag, those that bullied me no longer took me for an easy mark. While I am not sure if they would have understood the meaning of the word respect, they treated me differently and no longer taunted me.
One of the conclusions of the article is that parents should not use bullying to coerce a child into losing weight. Even considering my childhood, it is a conclusion with which I whole-heartedly agree. Besides, often times parents, guardians and even teachers may not even be aware there is a situation. My parents never knew I was being bullied. I never uttered a word. Even when it became physical, I would just shrug it off as a fight. (When I was a kid getting into an occasional scuffle did not raise any alarms)
However, parents need to be aware that if their child is overweight or worse, obese, that child is more than likely, to some degree being picked on.
It is happening.
It may be as mild as being called names or it could be much worse. Though I 100% agree with the conclusion that any degree of bullying should not be used as motivation for the child, it could be used as motivation for the parent. As I have written before — obesity is not a complex problem, however when it comes to children, they must be properly guided. They must be handled with care. Their emotions and body image can be negatively influenced if they perceive that their own parents regard them as different.
They need direction.
They require affection and love.
They must have parental involvement.
In my youth my parents helped in both little and big ways. They purchased a weight set as a gift. My mom would prepare foods that would not adversely effect my weight. They allowed me to pursue my new passions. They supported and encouraged me.
I wasn’t any good at the sports I participated in, but my parents were in the stands for each and every game.
They came in the rain.
They came in the cold.
They came in the heat.
They sat for hours, just to watch me sit on the bench. It didn’t matter to them whether I played or not. They were proud and they showed it by being there. Most importantly — I knew they were there.
It is time for all of us to not only start to do battle with the epidemic of childhood obesity, but to emerge victorious. The victims are too young, they are too precious and they are too important for us not to.
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He has appeared on 94.3FM’s The David Maderia Show, Bounce Back to Your Brilliance w/Angel Tyree, What’s Weighing You Downw/Dr. Marilyn Gansel on FTNS radio, Nurture and Nutrition on Blog Talk Radio, Low Carb Conversations with Jimmy Moore and Friends, BlogTalk Radio’s Toni Harris Speaks, Internet Radio: Cathie’s Talking, TV -35′s Storm Politics with Tiffany Cloud, WILK’s The Sue Henry Show, Magic 93′s Frankie In The Morning, WBRE’s PA Live, SSPTV’s News 13, Public Television WVIA’s State of Pennsylvania and Call the Doctor; Entercom’s Outlook on Northeast PA with Shadoe Steele, Citadel Broadcasting’s Sunday Magazine with Brian Hughes, Lisa Davis’ Your Health Radio; Hank Garner’s Podcast, Dr. Robert Su’s Carbohydrates Can Kill Podcast; and the one and only Jimmy Moore’s Livin’ La Vida Low Carb podcast.
Dr. Joe Leonardi also will come and speak to your group; to learn more about his motivational speaking fees and availability contact him at docjoeleonardi@betterlifeseminars.com and check out his website www.betterlifeseminars.com.
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************The information in the videos is for information purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat any disease or disorder. The posting that I write do not apply to those with an underlying medical or hormonal condition. I advise anyone embarking on a weight loss and fitness plan to have a thorough medical evaluation. You want to be sure that you are physically able to exercise and you don’t have any underlying medical conditions.************
Related Articles
- Teens, Suicide and Bullying (yourmindyourbody.org)
- Bullying Is Becoming An Epidemic (homesecuritysource.com)
- October Is Bullying Prevention Month (psychology.about.com)
contributor to NaturallySavvy.com. He is available to appear on any talk radio, internet podcast or television outlet. His web site www.ObesityUndone.com is available to help you reach your goals.
Hi Doc,
Your article hit home with me. As a young child, I was overweight and I still remember the bullying, insults and negative remarks from my classmates. My best friend was tall and thin. When we walked together people said we looked like the number 10. It was devastating to me! I hope parents read your article and if they have an obese child, let them start immediately training their children to have healthy eating habits and exercise everyday.
You are an inspiration and a genuinely nice, caring, empathetic man.
Thank you for sharing this article with me.
I personally believe that children should be encouraged to be active in any way that they enjoy, and that parental support is vitally important in getting kids active.
The culture of bullying and of win or die in sports and activities for kids kills any joy, any inclination to want to participate in these activities. There are only a small percentage of people that can excel in any activity, and if the rest are considered somehow deficient or “losers”, why would they want to continue participating?
But if kids are being encouraged to participate because it is fun, it feels good and it makes them stronger, without pressures and bullying if they don’t meet arbitrary standards, then they are going to want to continue, to keep active and healthy.
This of course goes for weight as well. If a fat kid can join in to an activity without bullying and without being scrutinised at every step of the way, he or she is going to stick at it. Kids need encouragement, not scrutiny, no matter what their shape or size.
Bullying is a real issue that all parents are facing today. Kids can be so cruel. I have two young children myself and have already had to change childcare centres for one of them due to a bullying incident which has socially affected my child at the age of 4. (Not related to her weight in this instance)
I am always pleased to hear stories of stength, success and inspiration. I truly hope that you now feel the respect that you are so deserving. Well done for creating a fit and health you!
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